I'm sober. I want to stay sober, I genuinely think I'll end up killing myself if I stay sober any longer. I wanna be high because at least I wasn't able to feel everything all the time. I want the high of something so much stronger like fear gas. I can't explain why but I just know I'd feel better. I'd be numb, not real. I'd feel good. I can't keep pretending I'm okay here. I need to feel the slow numbing release of weed. I don't wanna feel real anymore.
Write it down. Let it go. No account, no name.
My addiction, my body, my hair, my family, my school, my religion, my grades and etc.
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