I feel so lost in life. Everyone is literally better than me at everything. I can't hold a conversations w anyone for long bc im so awkward, I've done nothing compared to ppl my age, I'm insecure af, and even though I want to be friends with loads of ppl I'm not capable of maintaining bonds w them. And don't get me started on my family ughhhh they r js a bunch of narcissists who always yell. Everytime anyone even slightly raises their voice I feel like crying and I physically cant stop myself from shaking, and its gotten to the point where a single targeted comment at me from anyone immediately makes my thoughts spiral. Plus they make me focus on my studies hence my terrible social skills, and guess what, I'm not even good at that..! Oh, and i have a chronic illness that ruins every other aspect of my life. I wish I could be normal and pretty and outgoing but oh well sigh