my now ex bf just dmed me and said that him and another one of our friends from the gc wants me to stop talking about smoking in general. first people i was comfortable enough to open up about my addiction, but now thats ruined all because of me! i cant even tell them how i feel because im just overreacting as fucking usual. what am i supposed to do? cut myself again and again until my arm is covered in deep cuts while blood runs down my arm? smoke until i dont care anymore? drink my feelings away? oversleep? bedrot until my room is disgusting and im disgusting? or am i supposed to just pop a couple pills and hope i overdose on them? am i supposed to go to school with several fresh styros under my arm warmers and hope no one tries to check? what the fuck am i supposed to do to express emotion in a way that wont result in me feeling worse or fucking dead? what am i supposed to fucking do??