I was exposed to porn at like 8. My friends (2 girls) and the boys staying over (one of the girl's brother and his friend) all watched it for like 10 minutes straight. I feel like a disgusting human being. I read 18+ comics and go on r34 despite being 15 and I always feel so disgusting and pray for forgiveness but always end up going back. I would literally kill myself if I ever had sex, but I'm obsessed with reading smut and adult comics and I just disgust myself. I just want God to fix me but He won't and can't and I hate myself for being such an awful human being. I'm 15, I shouldn't be watching this shit. I'm supposed to be the good one in my friend group, the one who gets disgusted a dirty jokes and has never had sex and gets perfect grades, the perfect influence. God, I hate myself sometimes.