i just found out that my mom has been grooming and s/a ing me for years, i kinda assumed that it was like that but i was gaslit for a while. a lot of the stuff she did (and does) can be assumed as motherly love but it really isnt. i don’t want to empathize with her but every adult in my life tells me i should because she’s my mother. i only have told one person, they want me to go to the police but i can’t because when i have nothing ever fucking happens. she’s heavily abusive as well. if i told a trusted person like my sisters they would call cps and yet AGAIN nothing would happen. i got raped by my uncle and she laughed at me. SHE FUCKING LAUGHED, told me I would always be “her virgin” and said i was lying?? i don’t get it. she touches and stares at me. i hate my body. i hate her. i wish i could fucking leave this planet. every attempt I’ve ever done didn’t work. i wish i believed in god. im still only 15 and every day makes me want to kill myself more.