I wish I never fell for all those fake TikTok scams, I deserved to be made fun of for being so stupid and gullible. I wonder if it's all predetermined. I want it to be. I don't want to take responsibility for myself, I want to die to stop embarrassing myself in front of others. To stop living just for this, to stop all this fucking ignorance when my mind snaps back to where it was before and I'm not living the full experience. I always denied creativity. Ha! They're laughing at you for even trying. Those grifters are still there waiting dispasionately. You're a chud. A pathetic chud. Why don't you do it here? I don't want to. If I were to kill myself, I want to at least hold out for a Yesenin death. I wish I could take those fuckers down with me or make them miserable while they're fucking happy.