My boyfriend is just using me to make himself better. He dosent love me. I know if someone else comes along im being left on the spot. I hate the way i am. I think maybe if i was pretty. Maybe if i was skinny. I could be loved the way i need. Im so alone in this world. Not one person actully cares about the real me. They only see what they want me to be. Ever since everything went down a few years ago, i cant escape it. I wish my body was different. I hate every thing about it. My scars, my fat, the way im built. I hate the way everyone i know just uses me for stuff. I want to be different.