i hate how i can never control what piece of media i fixate on, like if i start fixating on something i cant just stop when said thing becomes problematic or if the fandom is weird, and i always feel really bad about it because sometimes i wonder if i make anyone uncomfortable with it… i never do anything weird, its just a fixation and try not to mention it too much because i know no one wants to listen to me ramble about the lore of a stupid stupid roblox game.. but they know i have a fixation on it… they know im part of the fandom… maybe that alone makes them uncomfortable around me… i dont even know why i tend to fixate on things so hard… and i dont think im neurodivergent, ive never been diagnosed, i just wanted to say that before someone might suggest it… and another thing is that i see this one ship as my fucking parents… they’re fictional criminals they’d hate me! and i legit see myself as one of my favorite characters, which is just stupid…