I turned 20 today. I shouldn’t have made it to 18, let alone 20, and I’ve been kinda going through the motions. I don’t know what I’m doing, what I want to do, or if I even can on the chance that I do figure it out. I’m severely anxious and incapable of speaking up or doing little more than the bare minimum, so trying to get a job is a nightmare. I wish my family understood this instead of just labeling me lazy or immature, because even getting out of bed is hard. I studied art and in this day and age it’s frankly impossible to find a position that isn’t AI related. Everyone wants experience but nobody wants to hire. I want to create and live in something real, artistically and personally, but I also want to continue living day by day doing nothing. Everything is exhausting