Recently I've tried my best to be there for all of those that I consider my friends whilst they're struggling. I've even had 1 stay with me for around 2 months because their fiancé died, and I was travelling between their home, my home and work everyday to make sure their animals were cared for, while trying to maintain my own life. Now, 4 months to the day of the death of their fiancé, here I am trying to find a reason to not kill myself, and they could not even be bothered to answer the phone to me because they were busy getting laid. As that has been the new routine for them for the last couple months. I don't get to see anyone. I don't know anyone. No one cares whether I live or breathe unless they get something out of it. Telling anyone that the way they are treating me is wrong and unfair gets me no where, other than being guilt tripped and manipulated into saying everything is fine. Why am I so unimportant to people. I just want to be enough. I don't want to be here.