im so lonely. i have friends and parents. but im not close with them. not the kind of close where you can call them anytime to ask for advice or talk about problems. i realized its always been this way. ive never had someone my age to be close with. i dont have siblings or cousins that live near me. i only ever had friends that i would see at school. never really at my house or theirs. and i think covid ruined me. completely stunted my developing social skills. my anxiety is so bad i cant even get a job or learn to drive or talk to my therapist about any of this. i ruined my high school years. i almost failed every class and never went to a single party or did a single club. im such a loser. if i cant even get out of bed i cant see my life going very far. and i feel so bad for my mom. she tries so hard to comfort and help me but i just cant communicate with her. whenever she tries to get me to talk its like the words wont come out of my mouth. im the worlds worst daughter. im sorry