I think I love you. Im sorry that im keeping you in friendzone in your eyes but its a lot more complicated for me. Im so fucking afraid of judgement cuz we would be a queer couple. As you know 4 years ago I rejected my feelings towards you and I find it difficult to accept them now. Im currently under a lot of mental pressure, I am afraid of my future, I ignore it most of the time but because of it I experience often intense anxiety attacks. Im not in the best shape now, thats why I need you now more than ever, yet I don’t want to be a burden to you… I think you know by now im really shy about all that relationship stuff, its because it feels incredibly personal to me and I prefer not to get too affectionate in public. You’re the dearest person I ever had, I want to keep you by my side forever, but the future really makes me anxious… Im afraid our plans for further future might differ, Im so fucking scared of losing you and what we have, so just… Give me time to find strength. ~Z