hello. i dont think im okay. im not going to talk about it because i dont want to but i feel like i am detached from who i am as a person. i am not who i wanted to be and who ive decided i was over the last 6 years of my life. im do disappointed and upset but im also numb to life. my sadness hasn’t engulfed me as a person but only my mind. i hate it. excuses come and go into my mind but somewhere in a little corner of my brain i know the truth. i hate it. i want to give up so badly. i want to run away from the life i have planned for myself and instead give myself something else. deep down i know that if i do run away then i will never feel the satisfaction that i crave for fulfillness in life. i dont know what to do. i dont have anyone to talk to. i surprisingly haven’t cried - i think because i was sort of expecting it, but secretly hoping that it wouldn’t happen. i dont know what to fucking do. i feel like im trapped in my brain with no escape. i am distant from my soul. i know it s