parents acrued massive debt to send me off to private school as a long-term investment. i'm basically having to study my family out of our current financial situation. we currently live in a house with no heating, no hot water in the dead of winter. we receive government aid and live just below the poverty line in my country. i can't cry at home, i can't cry at school. i don't want to burden anyone with this knowledge and also don't want any of my friends to treat me differently. no one i know knows what it's like to stay behind while everyone goes off to excursions, camps, exchanges, to be the only one who doesn't eat out with everyone else, to buy shitty birthday gifts for the best of friends. it frustrates me that my siblings won't have the chance to receive the same educational opportunities as i have. after i graduate i'm off to university with a gigantic debt on my conscience that'll only get bigger. so burnt out and have 0 motivation to do anything, i'm so over this.