God all i want to do is fucking forget. I dont want to remember anything anymore. And ive tried to talk to people but it doesnt fucking work. I give up, im done. Its never happening again im never talking about this shit with anyone ever again, its my fucking problem that no one needs to get involved or deal with, no matter how much it hurts. I dont care how much pain its causing me and how im always thinking about it. How im loosing sleep and how It makes me want to puke out my insides. I hate it, hate it, I fucking hate it. Theres nothing left to fucking do about this I AM STUCK DOING FUCKING NOTHING LIKE A PATHETIC PEACE OF SHIT. I hate myself, I could have done something I COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING AND I FUCKING DIDNT. I hate all of this. I cant fucking wait for the day i actually kill myself. All I wanted to do is fix things, I wanted to feel better, but its really not worth it now is it? None of this matters anymore. Im done trying and if this becomes to much and I kms who cares.