you know when your feeling good. and then you click on a 3 hour youtube video with ambient music and it completely tears you apart like its made of your trauma? i havent cried uncontrollably in years and some random stupid youtuber did it. i cant talk to my friends, theyre sleeping. like normal human beings. i dont have my phone, i cant text people in other countries. its almost midnight and im laying in the dark the blue ambient screen shining on my face as i lay down with my eyes closed succumbing to the music i know my heart cant take. why do i feel like this. nothing happened. im not even stressed by school right now. what is wrong with me. why does my heart take the one thing i love and weaponize it.
the world1 felt this