Sometimes I remember my brother yelling at me and slapping em and telling me to stop being a burden on everyone so I remember that then hate myself. I wish my life was shitty and I had my own room so j could just end it. I guess I should make most of it. Sometimes my mom interrupts me or hugs me or pats my leg which make me uncomfortable and ask myself why I’m not good enough to be of worth for people to care. I hate how some people care about me. I hate boys but not all because I sorta hate my dad for things he’s done my brothers, teh only thing I can remember well about them is when they made me feel like nothing, and I have several bad experiences with boys and I hate myself for it and wonder why I’m alive, I wish my parents hadn’t had me sometimes. I hate this. Why am I too fat then too skinny? Why am I a chatterbox then quiet as a ghost? What the fuck is wrong with me? Why can’t I be fuckjng normal??