Imagine being villainized just for something human like the desire to belong or seek affection. I never had that as a child, and unless I go through months of therapy, I'm expected to swallow and forget. It makes me dislike all better ideals. I notice my wound opening up while striving. I feel like the whole structure of my mind is a prison, a trap set out by others, and I can't be obliviously happy just living in the prison of someone else's thought process. I have to be stuck here. It's like how you have to have losers in this world. You need to have the lesser beasts on the land in a fantasy adventure, but the hero is secure enough to set out on their own journey. I feel that I will never have that.
frustration1 felt this