Obviously getting wounded sucks. I get a few nicks and scrapes every once in a while but so far I've only been temporarily crippled by explosions fucking with my hearing or getting my leg caught in something stupid like razor wire. Anyway I do enjoy combat. I feel like I belong there. I have had squad mates killed right next to me and I miss some of them but I'm not paralyzed by fear when I'm shot at or a few mortar rounds or grenades start going off around me. A lot of us are trained to be "dynamic" (keep moving so the enemy doesn't line up their sights on you) but a lot of guys fall back on instincts like freezing up or hinding. I don't blame them for hiding. It works but then a lot of them sneak off away from the combat and report what's going on from complete safety. I'm kind of mad because more rifles on my side always gives me a better chance- I just- I think I should have been killed and done for a long time ago. It's not normal for me to be like this.