life isnt going easy on me and to be honest it never really has. i just feel that so much has been taken away from me, that was supposed to be mine, my friends, my social life, a school life where i wasnt bullied for my short height or my ugly looks it was mine but my parents took it all away and i cant really ever forgive them for it, the hate i feel for them is immense and exhausting. its a nonstop cycle of misery, ive forgotten what is it like to be happy and i dont feel happy anymore. i just feel hollow and a constant void in my chest that i cant escape no matter how much i distract myself from it, , i mourn the life i couldve had everyday and i feel hopeless its getting hard to stay alive, my dad thinks im stuck in the past but i dont do it willingly, its stillness that depresses me and , recently ive started to think that good things arent meant for me, like i dont deserve them, cuz im not enough, i go to sleep everyday hoping i dont wake up but i always do and that depresses me