I hate being alone at 21, seeing others around me being in love. And it makes me wonder why my time hasn't come yet. I've talked to two people over the past year, and both times my heart was broken just before a relationship could even happen. Why? Well because i didn't fit the beauty standard...All because I'm 4'9, having a chubby body and dealing with excessive body hair from my PCOS (PMOS). It made me spiral so badly that I started believing maybe I wasn't meant to be loved at all. Finding myself comparing my appearance to everyone else, wondering why and what they had that I didn't. I started picking myself apart, wishing that I'd look different just so someone would choose me. And It hurts because I wasn't asking to be perfect, that I just wanted to be loved for who I am. Even now, those experiences still affect how I see myself, and I'm trying to remind myself that my worth isn't defined by someone else's opinion or by whether I fit today's beauty standards.