My family is Christian and very religious at that but I can't seem to agree with them. I'd like to believe in God and I did back then but I guess something in me changed? I feel forced to go to church and whenever I do I tend to fall asleep which brings my parents to disappointment. Whenever I accomplish something my family says to "Be sure to thank God for your talents" or "Turn to God for advice and always thank him" but I wish they'd see that it is ME who does all this, does well and is talented, not some fictional man you call your God (no hate Christians, I personally don't really believe.) My beliefs are so confusing as well, I'd like to think hes real but all the stories don't make sense and its so confusing!!! If God really is real why do people suffer, why does rape happen, why do people as kind as my friends, family and others feel pain? Why do I live in fear of going to hell? I have so many questions of my belief and its confusing to explain :(