i genuinely can’t do this anymore i havent felt like myself in years. i’ve been feeling empty and quite literally depressed for such a long time, that i genuinely can’t stay happy for too long since im so accustomed and comfortable with that familiar empty feeling. i try so hard to cover it up in front of others so that they don’t suspect me of anything, but i also want them to know that there is something wrong with me. but then again, even if they knew, they would never take me seriously. they think of me as a joke, and honestly i can’t blame them. i never really take anything seriously either, and i always downplay my problems to make them seem minuscule. but for once i just want someone to understand me. to understand why i do things, why i react to things the way i do. i just want someone to see me and understand where im coming from, and not just dismiss me. ive been harming myself in many ways. i honestly think ending it would be best for me in this situation.