Okay so basically my parents read the last pages of my diary and found out im suicidal and do sh. Now they wont leave me alone, limits on everything, babyproofed the house, and im on meds and going to therapy. I think im getting worse. i genueinly didnt know if i was gonna die last night. they keep telling me to talk but i they dont understand i dont even understand nobody could ever understand. i have so many problems that can never be fixed and i hate myself. i could go on and on venting. if i told my therapst the truth, i think id end up in a mental hospital. ive been trying not to cut, but latly its been really hard. im so tired of eveyrhting and nothing is helping. i feel fake and nothing feels real. im constanty being watched. i cant stand it. i cant even describe the feeling i get. im sp useless and hopeless. what a freak. thats what i am. i wish everyone could forget i exist and i could run away and d!e someplace, bleed!ng out in the snow all alone.