I feel absolutely horrible. I fear things will never be the same again. No matter how much i try to pull you back you'll always resist it. I wont force you to be with me. But you wanted me to be this way with you. And I wanted you the same. Now you're scared of attachment when its all our relationship has been. I can barely function. And its hard to see you any differently. You said in general and even with me too. Out of all people. You dont want to stay attached to me? I swore my undying loyalty. And I know its hard to trust me. Because I know I was truly loyal to you. So I can understand why. And I think the reason I truly feel horrible about this is because I know I deserve to be left. But right now things feel so dead. And I question wether or not I should try. I care for you. I love you. It has been only you. And yet. It all feels like it'll be in vain. Wether or not to let go of what I am feeling or wether to keep fighting what feels like a losing battle. Im not sure anymore.