I feel like I’m drifting away, but not willingly. I wish the people around me made me feel like I mattered. They ignore me when I try to speak, or they outright turn away. I don’t get what makes my life not worth as much as anyone else’s. I don’t know what kind of a person I am that I’m treated equivalent to none. I hate myself, and these people enforce it. I know if I say something, I’ll get attacked for it because I’ve seen it within a friend group I’m somewhat around. They talk shit about their own friends, and especially one because she acted like she was left out. I don’t want them to talk behind my back, but I feel they probably already do. My best friend barely talks to me because her boyfriend is more important. If I were to die, it’d be those assemblies that people easily whisper during. Suicide isn’t even an option because through death, I’d never escape the reputation tainted on my life through the lies of how people perceive me for how I seem, not who I am.