I wouldn't say I have a big ego. In fact, I don't even view myself as human anymore. But, I like thinking of myself as powerful. The one who backtalks to a rude person when everyone else is trying to be polite. I like to think I could manhandle any bitch. That I could take down anyone or anything. And the fact that I might not be able to scares me. I joke about the thing with B like it's nothing, but I'm scared shitless. B has power over me in his hands, and I don't like that. Whenever I'm alone with him, or even his normal self, I want to crawl out of my skin. I'm not tough. I'm really not. Underneath the shell of a subhuman who wants to be a real boy is a scared little girl who just wants Daddy to stop yelling at her.
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