I feel so angry. I feel so mad at the world mad at the system. I feel so mad at the ppl I let in my life that took what they wanted. I feel I cant rest until I let him know. I wont rest until I get some sort of satisfaction. I still havent read the email partly b/c I dont want the torment of knowing u moved on and are happy. I dont know what it will say but I know I am not done yet. You could say its an obsession you could say I am crazy but what matters to me is that I feel some sort of satisfaction out of it. Maybe thats why I still hold on to this entity b/c I havent found what I wanted yet. Strangling it because if I let any sort of relaxation in my grasp it will slip away. I need to suffocate it until the life drains out of it, wouldnt that be lovely.