Sometimes I don't even feel like I'm alive. I feel like I'm see through, at school, home, even just alone in my room. I don't understand why I feel this way. I don't know how to make friends; I don't even think I want to. That's so weird to me, though. I don't want to make friends or put myself out there, yet I feel so alone. I have my cat at least, but I feel the craving for human affection. It's just when I get it, I suddenly want to be left alone and lie in bed and do nothing because it's so draining to me. I hate the way I am, how I feel alone even when surrounded by people. I don't really know how to put what I feel into words, so I'm trying this out to maybe feel seen or heard for once instead of feeling like I'm completely see-through or made of glass. I know I should probably sleep, but I physically can't. I just space out for hours, and suddenly the sun is coming up. I haven't slept in two days; tonight will be the third day in a row, and it is currently four in the morning.