I feel like i'm never anyones first choice. No ones best friend, no ones partner, no ones favourite, ... . Everyone has someone more importante. I'm just a background character, a backup option. I'm never the best, but also never the worst. I'm just there. No one importante. Just existing. What ever i do, i always get over looked and ignored. Messages never really read, stories never really listened to. Just there if they need me, but only then. But the people around me are not bad people. they consider me their friend. Just not importante enough to care about more then just checking if i'm alive once in a while or asking me for favours. My own parents don't even see it. They take my brother serios, but nor me. I'm just the after thought. They don't notice my sleep getting worse, my eyebags heavier and darker. I'm honestly not motivated enough to care anymore. I'm not really happy nor sad. Just there. I will jusy go on numb. I don't wanna leave, i just wanna be happy not numb