I really just hate how little I matter or how little others care about me. Have you ever felt that way? Trying to be the best you can be, but no matter how hard you try no one ever notices or appreciates it? I worked hard to get the achievements I've gotten, yet I always find someone better than me or happier than me. I try to feel important to my friends and my family, putting in my best and my attention and I get nothing in return. Sure, I don't expect anything in return, but I deserve a little appreciation or gratitude. Not only is my school life just hell, but my friends make it harder. I try to plan something fun and then all hell breaks loose and I get my hopes up and end up canceling the plans. I do something special for their birthday and they won't even do the same for mine. I feel second best compared to all my friends. Why can't I feel important for once? Why can't I feel smart or pretty or appreciated? I wish I could just be good enough.