I want to cut off all my friends. I love being lonely and they are horrible influences. At the same time I can’t. I’ve done it before and I know I’ll regret it. I just want to be alone and I want to be lonely. I don’t want someone waiting on me to be ready to have fun again. I just want to cry and let it all out. My throat feels tight but the tears won’t come. I’d rather be sad than fake being interested.