I’ve been so close to committing. I’m a thirteen year old queer girl so that immediately puts me at a hard position with the state of our government and me being young. I may be salty and annoying and biased but things are just so terrible now. I’m so young and I’ve already tried to commit four times. God fucking hates me and won’t let me just descend to my designated place in hell, but I just need to escape where I am now. My mom has been poking at me to break up with my girlfriend because she disapproves of her demeaned and my dad just doesn’t speak anymore. The girl I’m with is the love of my life and the most beautiful girl I’ve ever lied my tattered eyes upon. She’s the reason I haven’t tried the fifth time. I cut myself daily and wear long sleeves and cargo jeans to hide it and just call it my ‘Skater’ style. I’m so tired nowadays, and I just wish I could go back to when I was younger when my mom wouldn’t yell, my dad wouldn’t hit, and when I was happier. I hope I can leave soon.