No one takes me seriously and I’m just so tired of it. I’m trying my best to get my life together but all they see is someone who doesn’t try hard enough or do enough or be fast enough. Everything I fucking do, every achievement or step forward I take gets belittled to a participation ribbon. I finally found a new passion. The chef and I had a genuine chat and he actually seemed to like me. He told me I’d be a right fit for the program. That meant something to me, esp with me living with anxiety. Then I told someone about it and they said, “Well of course they like you, they need students and they want your money.” It’s like they’re saying nice try kid, you just did what any average person would. It’s nothing special. I know I shouldn’t care what people think, and I don’t need the applause. But fuck man, can I just have a little acknowledgment? Can I be proud about something I did without someone immediately finding a way to make it feel smaller? I’m fucking trying.