I’ve been going through a really bad period mentally. I became extremely close with someone who was basically my best friend and the person I trusted most, and I ended up relying on her heavily for emotional support. Eventually she told me she needed a break because it had become too much for her, and although I respected that, the break has now turned into her essentially cutting me off. It has devastated me because I think about her every day and constantly compare myself to the people I imagine she’s happier being around. I’ve become incredibly lonely, angry and jealous, and sometimes that sadness turns into hatred toward her or toward people who seem happy while I’m struggling. I’m also autistic and have struggled for a long time with feeling fundamentally different and worse, and lately I’ve been feeling extremely disconnected from myself and disgusted with who I am. My mental health has deteriorated to the point where I’m having breakdowns almost every day & cry in my wardrobe.