the scars have faded, but i still want to cut myself. i know it's not a good thing, i have more important things to do, like my research, my club activities, my 3rd language homework, but no matter how much i distract myself, it always com back pulling my shirt. its like an endless hole that you cant fill, unless I come to terms with myself. that i'm actually useless, i cant focus on anything nor get anything done, how far ive gotten is pure luck and missed opportunities that i failed to make use of. i'm still incapable of doing anything required for people my age and its disappointing.