last night i laid in bed and thought maybe ending life early is a good idea. its something i have contemplated for a little while. i feel like no one knows the real true me. i mold myself to fit in. all it takes is a rope tied to the ceiling and thats the end. but that would hurt so many people... i couldnt im too scared. i faked a pregancy a couple weeks ago and ive faked a couple of bfs just to fit in. my reg life is boring and a sad story no one wants to hear. so i make up a fun life for myself and for others. in reality i just want it to end. the pain the sadness and the web of lies im in. but its to late now so i go foward and be happy when the suns out and sad in the moon. because no one cna know im not ok. my mom would get mad my christian friends would give me a lecture and everyone would ask why... and i dont have an answer to that.