Rant #19963

I saw someone saying to hang in there, when i brought up i want a nsfw art buddy and closest i ever had was paying for a fake friend. No, I've legit been mentally dying for years. I need somewhere to even just ask, at this point id take being told no by a million people if one finally says yes. I'm so close to wanting to break someone's face because i'm tired i have to lie just to keep up appearances since theres too many liars and prudes. I want a real answer.