I keep thinking and maybe I'm not designed to be in a relationship or what not bc it always ends up like this and yeah I'm not sitting here and saying it's everyone else's fault but I'm saying that it might be a me thing. Maybe I wasn't designed to have someone and when I do I don't know how to act or know rlly what to do or like something happened where drama stirs or even bpd gets in the ways and I'm the one that's acting up and idk how much more I can take at this point. I just want to be happy for once, I'm tired of seeing everyone else that way but when is it my turn????? Anytime I ask someone out k get rejected or have a plan to get closer and immediately get shot down like ???? Am I the issue ?????? Even with long distance I think so hard about what's going on and j seem so obsessed and I just miss them a lot of just get into this mood of not being enough before disappearing for a little bit and repeat the cycle no matter what I do :/ - junie (or p idc)