I long for a reliable father figure and someone who respects and doesn't sexualize every girl on the street. I wish my dad never viewed me that way. I wish he respected women. I wish 13 year old me never had to feel self conscious if he was ever staring at my body. I wish I was more than just a girl to be sexualized and avoid getting into these weird scenarios made up by my dad, bc that's all he ever thinks about. What girls wear (ONLY girls specifically), whatever thought that comes to him first when he sees a girl, staring at girls irl or online, etc. Most days I feel like it's more comfortable to be a guy bc I always see them having it better (not putting down whoever goes through similar). That way I don't have to worry about my dad lusting over me . I hate my dad and I wish I grew up with someone better.