ALSO I can't ask questions without being on the verge of having a nervous breakdown. I AVOID communicating things because I don't want to be snapped at by grown ass TEENAGE ASS adults. Fucking CUCK ASS IDIOTS. I have been in a major funk the past month. I always am from August to September. Especially this year. It's been years since my mom died, and I have such a latent grieving response. It was extremely hard around that time, my nervous system has not forgotten. All I think about each day is how I'm going to kill myself. But I won't, I have people I don't want to hurt, so I endure. But when I go into work, and I'm already in a shit mood, then I have some short dicked loser and a genuine fossil bitching at me I boil over and breakdown in the bathroom. I bet they think it's all them and I bet they genuinely get all giddy about it. It feels like breaking down at that is giving them satisfaction and I don't WANT to do that. But I can't help it. GOD I NEED A NEW JOB PLEASE. BURN IT.