I want to cut myself again but j cant and i hate it so much omfg i been clean for a year yet i still can see my scars and the thing is none of them were permanent so ik im seeing things gosh i miss the feeling of the blade on my skin but i cant vent to anyone about it they'll say "You shouldbt do such things blah blah its bad for you" and just acting like im an idiot who doesnt know the consequences of sh and i hate it i hate it but if i do it again itll be too obvious even tho if end up doing it again ill do it my thighs now sigghhhhh i even tried to cut my thugh with a scissor but i was too afraid to go deep and i just scratched my thigh anf i didnt even feel a thing cuz i didnt even do fucking anytging but i cant tell anyone i dont want any other way to cope other than to cut myself i swear i miss it so much im going insane atp but i have no reason to be upset cuz everything in my life is going great but whatever dont mind that i didnt use any punctuation i just needed to vent