my boyfriend was unfortuntely involved in a mass shooting and broke up with me afterwards since it was really hard on him mentally and i wasnt there to comfort him as he was on vacation and he was just in shock/depressed for a few weeks. we ended up getting back together the day he came back from vacay but i honestly feel weird about the relationship. i know its so fucked up but i cant help but hold a grudge for him breaking up with me. the breakup also happened on our 3rd year anniversary... there wasnt much i could do for him over the phone and i hate that there was just so much pressure on me to fix the situation. i honestly still feel weird about everything since he also picked up smoking and didn't tell me anything and i had to find out by other means. it just gives me anxiety and i feel so bad. i know i should just communicate with him.. but i just wanted to rant about it for now.