I low key hate my life and miserable litterally every single day ever since I looked for God 2 years ago my life feels just fking awful and nothing in life is going how I wanted the only good things that came out it that went right was I'm in far less pain then I used to be and I was in pain for many years and I also do sht ton of good things/ charity stuff I don't even do it for rewards, I gave up on trying to get the actual jesus to notice me about 2 years ago now I just do it bc I like it but I swear to you my life honestly feels worse and I disagree with the bible a lot not everything but a lot. I did more than my share of bible studies & I'm telling you it shouldn't be this fling hard and this fking awful every ounce of my soul screams this isn't the actual jesus that I'm under, I believe he exists but this is not him, and honestly I just truly do not believe the actual jesus christ can hear me when I pray I swear it reaches something that isn't him instead it sucks. Jesus suxs