I think i've accepted the fact that no matter what I do I will always be considered unattractive by other people. i've never been complimented on my looks; if I am, it's always on either my clothes or something I own. I have always been really socially awkward but I had a big friend group until I went to high school. I went to a different school than my friends so I basically had to start from scratch. when I tried to talk to people they'd look at me like I was disgusting. I had made one friend by being up her ass, and now I am lowkey unhappy with our friendship bc it feels like i'm there to js listen to her and it's so draining. I have felt beautiful but that is when I am alone in my room at odd hours in the night. the worst part is that my little sister is the most gorgeous girl ever. im sure people wonder how she is related to a pimpled ogre like me. if you're unattractive and shy as a girl they brutally murder you and ridicule you for the rest of your life