Rant #12373

I just wish I could stop being whatever I am. Sure, I may have explanations, diagnosis’s, know technically why I do certain things, know I’m not alone. I should be grateful, but for some reason that’s still not good enough for my head, like still hoping one day I’ll suddenly ‘grow out’ of all of it. I just can’t get it in my head to accept anything I feel that doesnt just end with there must be a way I can ‘fix’ it that I just haven’t tried hard enough yet.