so im failing physics for the first time, and i feel so alone. Everyone is telling me its okay but i dont know if it is. I feel so done with everyone, and i wanna just graduate. I know life gets better but idk if i can do this anymore. Ive never been a person to "just pass" and i lie and say i dont care but it hurts to not go to a school that used to be my dream. I want to be a writer, I cant do that. I want to do something with my life that id be proud of as a kid, but i cant. I just want to be happy, for a second. I don't want to doubt. And i want to ask a girl out to prom, but im so scared of a no that i just cant do it. I've been hurt so many times but i dont want to be alone. But we graduate and go to different schools in a few months. How do I do that? Is it worth it? will she think it is. I want to be a teen forever but i also dont. I want those movie scenes. I want to believe in myself but I cant. I feel like a failure who cant even do the one thing she wants. I'm just tired :(

I hate my family who never teach me to live properly. One of them scolded me for my imature personality even when I was a literal kid then.

basically my brother comes to me and tell me he has a project, SPENDS 5 HOURS ON JUST 7 SLIDES, MIND YOU i have STUDIES, im constantly studying non stop for college preparation and I'm currently handling research interviews so theres no time for ANYTHING AND MY PARENTS DON'T BELIEVE ME EVEN THOUGH THEY SAW ME IN 15 MINUTE LONG INTERVIEWS)).so im telling him shortcuts to finish faster (ex. Ctrl z to undo etc.) He doesnt listen AND SPENDS LONGER AND LONGER. He finishes and decides to spends another HOUR TO DO TRANSITIONS ON HIS PRESENTATION. i tell him ill do it for him. I finish it in five minutes and send it to him, he goes out of the room. Tells my mom i was treating him unfairly and that im being over dramatic. She decides the same night shes buying him a PC ( SOMETHING IVE BEEN BEGGING FOR SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL) and said im an ungrateful brat and that I'm disrespectful and I'm ruining my brothers masculinity and that they'll buy him all the stuff he wants and I should just fuck off