I've been 18 for about half a year. My grandmother was my main caretaker and passed last December. I keep hearing from my parents that I don't need to learn everything at once, and that I have time to figure out taking care of myself. Thing is, my parents were both addicted to illicit substances previously. My mother is the person I'm living with right now, and she's been clean for a long time, but I know the damage is done. She still smokes as well, has been trying to switch to vaping but her work always stresses her out and drives her to smoke. I lost my grandfather to throat cancer from smoking. I know that everything combined doesn't bode well for my mother. I don't want her to take care of me forever, but I still love her. I don't want to lose my mother. I don't want to be alone. But she's 50, and with her medical history I'm afraid for the worst. I'm only ranting here because idk if my insurance covers therapy. I'll be alone soon, and I'm scared. I wish I was braver.