I have a very strong feeling that i have obsessive compulsive disorder and its eating me alive, every single moment of my life revolves around it and it suffocates me so much that im angry and agitated all the time. I get angry at my friends for triggering my compulsions even though they can’t help it and they dont know and then I zone out and mindlessly count to ten a million times or dig my nails into my palm. But at the same time every time i try to explain this feeling i sound so so stupid, like a tiktok mental health faker. I sound like im trying to tick off every single ocd box just to get a diagnosis, but im really not. I just dont know how to word my feelings. But honestly everything in my life is somehow a jinx to me, and i constantly worry about things like if i am racist or a pedofile. But I AM NOT, i spend counless hours in my head trying to argue with myself about this but it NEVER GOES AWAY.